"Final" Nicaragua reflections

This time back to Latin America was different for me. It had been almost 2 years since I had been out of the country - probably the longest stretch I've ever stayed in the USA since I started traveling 17 years ago. 

Somehow I noticed things in Nicaragua this time that I had either forgotten about, or maybe didn't notice as much when traveling before. 

Some of it was extremely familiar. The blast of humidity that greeted us as we walked outside the airport in Nicaragua - oh, how I had missed the extreme humidity! The smells that were foreign, and yet so oddly familiar from previous time spent in Latin America. The lack of personal space, especially when it came to my kids - countless number of people patted them on their heads or squeezed Henry's chubby cheeks. The taste of homemade tortillas. Fresh fruit juices and smoothies. Dogs that bark all night long. The list goes on…

But because I had my two kids with me, I was able to see certain things with a different perspective this time. The potholes and uneven ground, that make it so difficult for little feet to navigate. The stray dogs that somehow seem appealing for my kids to pet. The trash we had to avoid while walking around. The horses pulling carts that people use as their means of transportation - each one seemed just as exciting to Henry as the last. 

As we were in Nicaragua, Adele knew we were in a different place. But she wasn't able to verbalize the differences she was seeing. Now that we're back, we are seeing her express things that she noticed were different about Nicaragua:

"Here we can throw the toilet paper in the toilet!"

"We can say 'thank you' and not 'gracias' here because we're not in Nicaragua."

"Let's play pretend - I see a gecko on the wall! Let's catch it!"

At 3 years old, it's fun to see her recognizing that where we live is different than the country in which we just visited. 

Adele has already asked if we will be going back to Nicaragua someday. Naturally, we hope to always have Latin America be a part of our lives. It's fun to toss around ideas of living abroad again sometime, or in what capacity we can travel back down to Latin America. 

Our friend Trevor, who has worked in Costa Rica with LASP forever, was up in Nicaragua with his students while we were there. We had a great time visiting with him and catching up. Trevor and his wife Laura are dear friends of ours that we got to know while we lived in Costa Rica. And after working with LASP for many years, they have made the decision to return to the USA to live.

I was talking to Trevor about their decision to move back, and asked how they were doing with the approaching move date. He explained how it wasn't about wanting to leave Costa Rica or being unhappy with their current situation, but it was more about life's natural processes and in their lives they had to continue to take steps forward (though naturally he put it more eloquently than that). 

That's some true wisdom.

I have no idea if we'll ever live in Latin America again. I don't even know when we'll travel back to our favorite places again. But I do know that my travels have shaped me into being the person that I am, and I hope the same for my daughter. If she as a 3 year old can begin to recognize differences between countries, I hope that as we as a family continue to take the natural steps forward in life, we will continue to reflect on past experiences as our world views continue to evolve. 

Fun Nicaragua memories

Once we settled into our new routines in Nicaragua, we really enjoyed our time. Here are some of our favorite memories:

-Walking to the main park and petting the horses lined up waiting to go on a horse/carriage ride.

-Singing the theme songs to Adele's favorite Disney Junior shows loudly while the kids danced around the condo.

-Gecko-watching while eating in restaurants.

-Swimming every day, with each swim followed by a popsicle.

-Visiting with Hyung (and buddy Brian) and David Bond (and wife Bethany), former students of ours from the QERC semester program in Costa Rica, who were traveling in Nicaragua and Costa Rica.

-Spending time each day chatting with the staff at the condos, whom Adele considers good friends now.

-Taxi rides to the grocery store - "we don't have to wear buckles in taxis mommy!"

-Visiting with Tona, the pet parrot at the condo.

-Watching Henry go on bike rides with Nelson, his favorite Nicaraguan.

-Catching up with the LASP staff who were in Granada for a few days with their current student group.

-Playing "I spy" and looking for beautifully colored houses and school buses.

-Visiting the farm that we used to take students to for Nicaraguan home stays. Letting the kids feed the goats, hold bunnies, touch the pigs' noses, and "talk" to the geese.

The last two weeks of our time in Nicaragua, David was with us almost the entire time, and his parents also visited. We got to show them around Granada, and then traveled a little bit to Ometepe Island and to the coast at Playa Gigante. Here are some of our favorite memories from that time:

-The horse and carriage ride around Granada.

-A boat tour around the islands of Lake Nicaragua.

-Visiting the artisan market in Masaya.

-Searching for monkeys - and finding several troops, one with at least 23 monkeys!

-Playing in the waves. Running from the waves.

-Digging and building in the sand.

-Catching critters - turtles, hermit crabs, geckos, anoles.

-Playing "family" and reading books before bedtime.

-Waiting ALL day for a ferry from Ometepe Island back to the mainland. Playing in the park over and over again while we waited.

-Our composting toilet in our home on Ometepe Island - and teaching Adele how to use it!

-Buying fresh seafood for dinner at the beach and letting Adele help pick it out.

-Henry's critter encounters: the time he ate a gecko tail. And when we found a scorpion in Henry's swim trunks right before putting them on him. And finding him playing with a VERY large cockroach. And then there was the time Henry stuck his finger in the rabbit cage and the rabbit tried to bit it off…

Yicaraga

Adele had talked about going to "Yicaraga" for a long time. Pretty much as soon as David left back in January, she talked about going to join him almost every day. 

Our reunion with David outside of the airport in Nicaragua was simply awesome. I had Adele wearing her backpack leash, since I had Henry in the wrap and wanted to make sure I knew Adele was with me at all times as I also had to keep eyes on my luggage. I saw David through the window and felt a huge jerk as Adele lunged, trying to get to him as fast as she could. 

Sadly, as I mentioned in a previous blog, our first week in Nicaragua was one of the roughest times I've ever had with Adele. 

David was with us for a short 3 days, and we both noticed she was acting different. Looking back, I'm sure she was feeling sick, as the night before she had spent throwing up and a few days later after David left she resumed her vomiting. But what David and I noticed was how quiet she was. Our lively little girl who usually talks our ears off was hardly saying a word. And when she spoke, it was in the most hushed little voice.

Things got worse when David left. I think Adele was confused, after having just been reunited with her daddy. And I think there was some level of depression. And the sickness. And not to mention the culture shock that she was experiencing on some sort of child level. 

The food was different. The people looked different. The smells were different. The language was different. The cartoons on TV were different. Even Disney Junior on the internet was in Spanish. (I was looking for anything of comfort for her!)

I pride myself a little bit on knowing my little girl. Having spent almost every single day with her for her entire life, I realize that I often know exactly what it is she wants, needs, feels, reasons for behavior, etc.

Here's an example of that: when we first arrived in Nicaragua, we had plans to go to the market to pick out a new backpack for Adele. David and I told her we were going to do that, and yet she kept insisting "I don't need a backpack; I already have one" (she was referring to her "leash backpack" we use for traveling"). She kept telling us that we should get one for Henry instead. I agreed that would be a good idea. Finally after numerous conversations like this, David turned and asked "so what are we going to do? We aren't really going to get Henry a backpack". I told him to trust me, and just go with it. We walked around the market, seeing backpacks that had different characters on it. We talked about which one Henry might like. And then Adele spotted a small pink backpack with 3 Disney princesses on it. All of a sudden, the idea of getting a backpack for Henry was completely gone. She had to have that backpack. So we got her the backpack, and David later turned to me and said "you knew that was going to happen, didn't you?" And I just smiled because I did know that was going to happen. I know my girl. 

That first week in Nicaragua, Adele was so different that I felt like I didn't even know her. It was sort of a scary thing for me. I felt helpless, and didn't know how to help my little girl snap out of her funk.

What happened after that first week set some great foundations for the rest of our time down in Nicaragua. Adele is a girl who likes routine. She also likes people. And she attaches herself to people and places fiercely. 

So we made our condo feel just like home. We made new friends and hung out with them often. I found foods that were well-balanced and let her eat the exact same thing every day for each meal. We danced...a lot. We created new routines, sticking to the same basic schedule each day and ending each evening with a trip to visit a Nicaraguan home across the street for a treat before bed. 

dancing!

Hanging out at our condo, singing

Getting her nightly treat!

By the time David came back, we had stories to tell him. People to introduce him to. Places to take him to. 

Adele experienced some huge personal growth in Nicaragua. From things like putting her face underwater for the first time, to giving hugs to grown Nicaraguan men that she had befriended, to confidently speaking her few Spanish words, to trying new foods (lobster!), she seemed to return to the USA having allowed herself to truly be immersed in a new future and environment.

And she is excited to go back. 

Henry

Just a quick break from Nicaragua stories and recaps to give the last monthly Henry update.

Henry is no longer my little baby boy. On March 26th, Henry turned ONE.

When Henry was little, he seemed so easy-going. Calm. My chill baby. As the months went by, I realize he was playing me for a fool.

Henry is a boy who is ALWAYS on the move. Unless eating or sleeping, that boy never sits still. Never ever. He loves to be chased, loves hide-and-seek, and loves to chase his sister.

While we were in Nicaragua, Henry was always on display. Not only did he attract attention because he was very white, but he is also chubby, has extremely blond hair, and has the most beautiful soft blue eyes that are otherwise non-existent in Nicaragua.

Anywhere we went, I could hear the chatter as people talked about him and pointed at him. Some people talked to each other about him, and others came up into his face and talked directly to him. Some tried inconspicuously to take pictures, and others walked right up and asked to take his picture.

Henry loved the attention. He would smile his toothy grin back at anyone, and often muster up a good "hola" to people passing by.

Yep, Henry tried speaking Spanish too.

Within a few short weeks, it was pretty obvious that Henry was understanding practically just as much Spanish as English. He would respond correctly to the Nicaraguans speaking Spanish in an appropriate way, and attempt to repeat words they were teaching him. His favorite words have become "mama" and "hola".

And while Henry became a bit more clingy to me right around age 1, another funny thing happened. It became shockingly clear that Henry prefers Nicaraguans to us North Americans. Henry would not want to go with his daddy, or even his grandparents who were visiting...and yet when a Nicaraguan walked in the room (even complete strangers), Henry turned on this charm and would go anywhere.

I also need to clarify one thing - I have said that Henry is always on the move, but there was one exception. Henry became particularly fond of one worker at the condos we stayed at in Nicaragua - Nelson. And somehow Nelson could get Henry to sit still with him for over an hour at a time while Nelson was being the guard outside the condo. It was like magic I've never seen before.

Some of Henry's other tricks as a one-year-old are:

Clucking his tongue to sound like horses coming down the street
Sticking his finger in his mouth and saying "shhhh" (we make this sound a lot to him - he is LOUD)
Saying "cheese" and grinning for the camera
Walking backwards, which he does mostly to show off
Dancing
Tackling his sister
Moving furniture around (somehow this is good entertainment for him)
Pointing out birds in the sky
Whispering
Mimicking all sorts of noises (sneezes, dog barks, etc.)

Needless to say, Henry makes us laugh. And shake our heads in disbelief. And wonder what in the world we have in store for the next year...

Love you Henry!

Back in business!

Aaaaand I'm back. I took a break blogging, but I am now back to give a recap and tell stories from our time in Nicaragua.

To begin:

The night before the kids and I left for Nicaragua, Adele got sick. The throwing up kind. Adele had never been throw-up-sick before, and I don't think she liked the experience. So while I was all packed and ready to get a good night sleep before beginning our long travels, the night ended up with my mom and I up late washing sheets, cleaning up vomit, and keeping a little girl hydrated and rested.

The next day, the kids and I had a long trek to Nicaragua. First flight went well, LONG layover in Dallas went fairly well (though exhausting with Henry constantly on the move and Adele with no nap and wanting to sit quietly while playing a game or watching a show), and the last flight to Nicaragua was decent. At least the second half was good. We had good help upon our arrival in Nicaragua to get us through customs with all our luggage and belongings, and finally got to see David. 

Adele was ecstatic, to say the least.

We only got a few days with David in the beginning, and Adele was in some sort of funk that she just wouldn't snap out of. The night David left, about a half hour after him leaving, Adele began throwing up again. This time, Henry also had a fever. Great way to start out our time without David. 

Those were our "dark days". 

I admit, those first few days without David I did some serious soul searching and wondered if it was a mistake to have come to Nicaragua. David was only going to be with us for a handful of days over the course of the first 5 weeks, and it was a really rough start when he left. 

I had wanted Adele to have some good memories of Nicaragua - Spanish, new foods, new sights, new experiences…and I had myself wondering if we should have just stayed in Oklahoma. Sure, it's tough to be on my own with the kids. I'm not cut out to be a single mother. But at least in Oklahoma we had routines. The comforts of familiar foods. Our own beds. Familiar toys. People to call and beg them to entertain us.

But with the help of some people staying at the condos near us, Adele started turning a corner for the good after 4-5 days. Henry's fever broke after a couple days, but you'd never know he was sick by his demeanor. 

The interesting thing about hindsight is that not only is it 20-20, but it also can somehow be rosy-colored. 

When I think back to our Nicaraguan days, I don't think much about our "dark days". I remember the fun, happy experiences. The kids speaking Spanish. Our dance parties. Our outings to the park to pet the horses. Lots of swimming. Popsicles after swimming. New friends at the condo we stayed at. Interesting taxi rides. The extreme anticipation and excitement over David's return each week. 

Before we embarked on our trip, I had lots of people tell me, "Oh I could never survive a trip like that". Whether they were referring to the actual trip down TO Nicaragua, or the time spent IN Nicaragua, the comment was always the same. 

I always wanted to respond, "What's the alternative besides survival?"

The thing is, traveling alone with two young kids is never easy. Being a single mother sure isn't easy. Traveling to another country and attempting to live, mostly as a single mother, with two young kids is obviously not easy. 

But survival? What's the alternative? 

Many people choose not to take on such an adventure. But anyone CAN. Just because it's not easy does not mean you won't survive. 

We actually had plenty of "dark" moments. Kids crying. Lack of sleep. Kids wanting only comfort food. 

But as I look back at pictures, and the stories I will tell…they will be the good memories. The ones that I'm sure Adele will also remember. 

The memories that made it completely worth going to another country with two young kids. 

More to come…