In the beginning

My youngest sister got engaged this week.

It was pretty exciting. Clever, too. Her fiance Robbie had planned everything in advance. The two of them went hiking on Tuesday morning, and at the right moment, he got down on one knee and asked the question. He gave her a ring he had made, out of an oak tree from his grandpa's backyard.

Later, after the hike was over, both sides of the family were there for a barbecue. As they were re-telling the story, the re-enacted the engagement part in front of the family. At that point, Robbie got down on one knee again and pulled out the "real" engagement ring - a beautiful sparkly diamond that made my sister Rachel cry all over again.

It was precious.

It's fun to see Rachel and Robbie as they are beginning to plan their wedding and start a new life together. Takes me back to the beginning for David and me...

One day in particular comes to mind when I think about those first couple years of marriage.

Naturally, you learn a lot about your spouse in your first couple days years of marriage. One of the differences David and I noticed was in the way that we clean. The day in particular that I'm thinking of was a Saturday, at our home in California. We planned on spending the day cleaning, so we got up early and got to work.

Sort of.

I set about picking up first, so the place would look tidier before actually getting to the dusting and vacuuming. David, on the other hand, opened up a "junk drawer" and sat down, organizing the one drawer. Within a short time, I had the place tidied up.

Except for the area where David was working, which had become messier as he organized the drawer.

We realized we have very different cleaning styles. Even the simple task of "cleaning" had different meanings for two different people. At the end of the day, our place was tidier, cleaner, and more organized. It was one of those days in the beginning that we did accomplish our goals, but took some time to figure out how to accomplish those goals together. Without driving each other nuts. I laugh about the day now, even though I'm pretty sure I wasn't laughing at the time.

Packing is another area in which we differ. I make lists. I feel as though I am practically finished packing - as long as I have my comprehensive list of what needs to go in which bag. David lays all his clothes out. He feels as though he is practically finished packing - as long as his clothes are out.

After almost 8 years of marriage, we've figured a lot of things out. I'm sure we still have a long ways to go.

But at least now, David doesn't get annoyed when I want to make a list of cleaning tasks that we need to get done before we start cleaning. And I don't get frustrated when David starts the cleaning day by organizing a pile of papers.

Which wasn't on the list to begin with.